“They are here!” A volunteer shouts and I see pretty decent crowd, when I look around. Actually it looks like the entire Carrboro.

“Seriously, we need to get out.” Chase says quietly, nudging me in the elbow. So, yes, the crowd covers most of the proofs for our efforts. I rise up and then our amiable company join the public and wait for Jake Newton and Steven Solomon to appear on the modest scene we created.

But the others seem to enjoy it. I mean, really. Most of them are screaming and jumping like that’s Madonna or Michael Jackson, for example. Maybe it’s because that’s Carrboro after all. Not much people come here. All of a sudden they are screaming louder, dancing and singing “Runaways”.

“Sounds good.” I say to myself.

“Definitely,” Kylie answers, reminding me of her presence. I completely forgot that she is still here, next to me. I guess it’s Regan’s fault.

“You know…Sometimes it sucks.” I blurt out. “Being a runaway.” I guess I should explain it now. “I mean, running away is not always the best.” It doesn’t sound better, though.

She doesn’t answer and then Newton’s voice echoes through the evening. It looks utterly unrealistic, because Carrboro is a town, where much noise is not well accepted. It’s one of those places, where you just know that there’s nothing to do and nothing to happen.

But that night looks like something new. Something higher. Like you’ve always wanted to climb somewhere, but you couldn’t and stood down, on the same tiny, empty place, without even the feeling of getting close to it. But it’s not because “someone took the plunge to play here”. I don’t know why, actually. Maybe it just came to the moment, when we all need to realize that something is wrong and there’s no point in denying it anymore.

“That’s for Starset!” Newton shouts and the chorus of Starset’s “My demons” echoes.

I cannot stop this sickness taking over
It takes control and drags me into nowhere
I need your help, I can’t fight this forever
I know you’re watching,
I can feel you out there”

“You were right, by the way.”  Kylie says. “Papers are much safer.” She smiles, but there’s no joy in that smile.

I don’t know what’s happening with me. Maybe it’s because of the utter mess in my head, but it’s probably because that’s the thing I’ve wanted to do for years. Whatever the reason is, I kiss her with all the desire I’ve repressed so far and when she kisses me back, the entire world suddenly stops existing. It’s like those moments, when you forget that you’re human and feel far over that. Much, much higher.

But before we come to our senses, the light of a street lamp goes out and a vial bursts. We don’t take the trouble to think of our actions and then I find myself standing in front of a spotlight, which makes me look like an undone cartoon character. I think that my eyes bright in this scary way again and I feel like every single person in here is staring at me.

Damn it!

And then I hear the sound of my vibrating phone with Meg’s name on the screen. I don’t need anything. Only Kylie’s eye, when she looks in hers are enough for me to know that something went terribly wrong.

Author: Yoana YORDANOVA

* Artist: Desislava Savcheva